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Great signboards!

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On the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."


On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels


On a Septic Tank Truck sign: "We're #1 in the #2 business."


Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."


At a Proctologist's door: "To expedite your visit please back in."


On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."


On a Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip Call your plumber.."


Pizza Shop Slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."


At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout."


On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door: "Hello. Can we pick your nose?"


At a Towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."


On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."


In a Nonsmoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you! are on fire and take appropriate action."


On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push."


At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."


On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff."


In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."


On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."


At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment."


Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."


In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"


At the Electric Company: "We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be."


In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up."


At a Propane Filling Station: "Thank heaven for little grills."

 

 

HEAVENLY PARADISE

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Owing to the increasing number of prayers and requests to GOD...HE has started a new call centre...

called HEAVENLY PARADISE..

magine what would happen if GOD installed Voice Mail in Heaven

When you pray, you'd get this response:


Read more...
 

date?!!

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Grandpa and Grandma always got very excited when they recalled the old
days they were together. They made a decision, one day to make
it "yesterday once more". They made a date on the river bank they used
to go when they were young. The next day, grandpa got up 7 a.m. in the morning,
dashed to the bank, picked up a big bunch of wild flowers before sunrise,
waited there for his sweetheart to come. But grandpa ended in disappointment
grandma never showed up even after sunset. Grandpa went home in such anger.
He opened the door, seeing grandma lying on the sofa with her pillow.
He threw the flowers on the floor and questioned:

 

"Why didn't you come to our date?!!"


Grandma hid her head in the pillow and replied shyly:

"Mom didn't allow me to go...

 

 

HARE RAMA JOKE

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We all know that Lord Rama have been addressed by different names like JANAKIRAMAN,KALAYANARAMAN,ANANTHARAMAN et..

Likewise Lord Krishna have been addressed by different names like GOPALAKRISHNAN,ANANTHAKRISHNAN etc..

One day our ancestors were thinking how to refer all these
names in an easy way.We all know that our ancestors are pioneer
in mathematics,with their mathematics knowledge they found
a concept called ARRAY. They decided to put all names of
RAMA in an ARRAY called RAMA & all the names of KRISHNA in an
ARRAY called KRISHNA. From then they started to refer them as
ARRAY RAMA ARRAY KRISHNA instead of all the names.

This is how the concept ARRAY get originated.

So its not HARE RAMA HARE KRISHNA but its ARRAY RAMA ARRAY KRISHNA.

 

Husband & Wife

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A wife was making fried eggs for her husband for breakfast. Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.


"Careful... Careful!!! Put in some more butter! Oh my God! You're cooking too many at once. Too many! Turn them! Turn them now! We need more butter. Oh my God! Where are we going to get more butter? They're going to stick! Careful... Careful!!! I said be careful! You never listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you crazy? Have you lost your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. Use the salt! The salt!"


The wife stared at him and asked, "What the heck is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"


The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving with you in the car."

 

 
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